Monday, May 19, 2008
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Where on earth to begin....
Good Man, aka G, is moving in, a big step for this gal that always seemed to pick the wrong guys. Don't get me wrong: I've learned loads from the relationships I've been in;
how to be a better friend,
how to strum a few chords,
how to chug a beer (this list goes waaaaay back, my friends,)
how to practice patience in virtue and patience in temper,
how to lose my temper when necessary,
how to recognize a better friend than lover,
how to steer clear from boys in bars,
how to truly remain a trustworthy friend and learn to lean on one as well,
and the list could go on with fortunate lessons learned before now.
In this relationship, I have learned:
how it is acceptable and perfect to simply be me and love someone who is simply him. I know we both want only the best for each other in character, habit, career, and personal growth while growing as a team.
A team. I have not felt that in years whilst in a relationship. I am so fortunate to know that this man would pick me first in dodgeball anytime, and in fact give me the role of Captain if I desired.
So that is that, my love life is loving. He wants a small wedding, he says, and we seem to both want a big marriage full of adventures, full of mundane calm as well. We could trek the Great Wall of China and still find joy in washing clay pots and noodle bowls side by side as the sun sets for us and us alone with the promise true of another day together hand in hand.
I promise to write more often, and not only of the mushy-mush of contentment. Updates soon and often on the 60 hour work weeks, gumption, and comitmments to creativity and health that I am making. Hugs to all that cross this blog!
Sunday, March 16, 2008
because I left the room.
I Love Him
Monday, March 10, 2008
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
It was a brief, sweet respite for he and I; his 70 hour work week shaved to only 50 by his choosing, and my new job glittering on the Tuesday horizon. We gassed up the Jetta and headed to the West.
Good Man is a quiet, modest good man when company is new and stories not known, yet he busses my mother on the cheek upon every greeting and shakes her beau's hand heartily upon meeting. Last minute plans were made after several first time introductions were eased and with bellies full of Mama's chili we headed to the lake and the venue with picnic tables under a canopy of cypress trees carved by many hands of hope with lover's names fresh and fallow.
I held his knee under the near full moon with my firm hoping hands and even firmer knowledge that I was a woman blessed with his consistent, patient understanding and unabashed adoration. I sit here now and write and know that I will bring him joy and give him the love he deserves and the commitment I have never thought possible from myself.
That night, while listening to the toads and crickets sing, arms intertwined and eyes tearing I told him that I am his forever, as long as he will have me, I want to wake up with his children in my arms, his love wrapping arms around my waist every morning till death. He told me that he was so weary and sad until he met me, he didn't even know; in his 35 years he has wanted to say "I love you," to his true love- which is me.
Monday, March 03, 2008
nevah knew love
hot damn I am glad I waded through a shitstorm of assholes to find one true heart, one loving man. I've known for awhile, but thought I'd just let the random blog readers know:
I AM A LUCKY GAL!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
I walked the line
I am an excited gal. Excited and proud that after yet another demeaning situation yesterday at the now-known-as-former job, I wrote a quick little email to HR, told my boss I was done speaking with him, asked him to have fun training my replacement that I had committed to transitioning for the next two weeks...and walked the fuck out.
I never meant to leave that way, although I am proud that I did it with dignity (although a little blubbering hit me at the door, I admit) and stood up for my persona in the last moments.
No more un-salaried frantic phone calls from my superiors, no more scraping by as busboys bring home more than me for half the hours and one sixteenth the work ethic, no more 'cover your ears Liza, this is Big Boy talk' demeaning comments, no more hiding that my lovely man whom I adore who loves me to no end walks the line there and deserves more time to himself and to us than he allows.
I am on a self-imposed (albeit broke) vacation for a week. I've spent the morning in Spring cleaning mode, tidying my new home office (!!!) where I will work about 50% of my time, readying my attitude and itching with pride.
This last year, these last twelve months have taught me so very much, so very, very much. God I am a lucky woman.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
To my work 'mates' known as 'managers'
Do you think my online porn addiction needs self-coitus-interupt-is when I am not getting paid enough to even indulge in the bought and kinked purchased variety?
i think not
Sunday, January 13, 2008
scary neighbor sitch....
Um, the cops left in hysterics....I now think she was killing her libido......
promise, and some darn funny coincidences...
the night before the interview- the partner's wife (vested in the business as well and going over the various resumes for the position that I am in the running for) realized that she is friends with my mom. Back home.
After the partner mentioned where he had moved to Florida from in the mid eighties- he and I were born in the same women's hospital half a country away, albeit a difference of 15+ or - years ago.
The venue space is 20,000 square feet of potential (gorgeous, imported from a turn of the 1800's century church timber trimmed) event space. I am currently working with about 5,000: and damn good at that.....
I am the only candidate out of 15 that has any knowledge of their other two Florida locations, and in fact have been a patron of their previous concepts from the mid-1990's as well. Back home.
I think I could rock the shit out of this opportunity given the complementing support and tools.
My weekend was a dilly.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Fingers and toes
Turquoise cap sleeve turtleneck is on standby.
Debating about buying some cheap and chic heels to accompany both.
Hair is tidied and washed-away-of-the-premature-gray.
My fingers are crossed and my notes prepared.
Wish me luck, random internet readers.
Damn fine interview in T minus.........
Saturday, January 05, 2008
It's a damn shame I'm not accomplishing any of the above...
My financial situation is feeling rather dire; so dire, in fact, that I wonder how hard it would be to partake in a spray tan, a flask of Jameson, a decent looking wig, and the gumption to walk on in to Dancers R0yale and let loose with the bump and grind.
The job search is...searching... I am still employed, of course, just not as gainfully as I would like. I've resorted to fibbing to my landlord this month while I borrow time until next paycheck. No more blathering about that....but I will ask:
"How in the G-damn hell did some 22 year old hostess that we hired 2 months ago get one of the friggin' catering sales jobs that I sent my (apparently-as-attractive-as-a-45-year-old-meth-addicted-hooker) resume in for??? Seriously? Did they pity the fact that she had a gaggle to support. And by gaggle I mean a nose that she could hide a kindergarten class in, and a set of chi-chis that could use a crane for their flapjack flipping?" --
ok, that was mean, bitter Liza coming out for a moment.
Bitter, bitchy and mean.
Sorry. I am.
She was a nice gal.
She truly was.
In the sidekick kind of way.
Jen L told me last night, in simple stated fact, "She must have known someone. That's how it works now. Don't worry. That's all that it probably was." That simple answer never would have occurred to me. Thank you Jen, for forcing me to imagine more than le'hostess giving casting-couch style sloppy blowjobs while she strapped her nose back to her cheek and slowly suffocated for the sake of her new job.
until next time.....
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Santa makes me feel good about myself.
While walking back toward the car today after a fruitless shopping trip, I was in step with a mother and her set of 4 to 5ish year old twin boys. The little one to my direct right had the quivering lip and the dragging gait of a child denied the most precious of commodities: a new book from Barnes and Noble.
Mama held a miniscule hand in each of hers, shoulder tote slung back, that maternal look of caution on her face as this disconnected group of shoppers and navigated the crosswalk.
Mama, "Santa is going to be here soon. Maybe he will bring you that book."
Little man, "You know what?" whimper-sputter-doleful look upwards "I hope Santa gets here quick, because he makes me feel good, and Mama? You don't make me feel too good right now."
Mama, utter patience "Yes, honey. I hope Santa gets here quick. He makes me feel good too."
My heart was swelling at that little man's poignant belief that magic does indeed still exist in the world. His very belief in the grandest of chimney sweepers who bring good books to even better boys although they sometimes drag their feet and give doe eyes to the Mama's of the world caused me to warm.
At that very moment, I heard something in me tick and I knew that there is a Santa out there who will make everything right in my small world as well.
Happy Holidays, folks, and may Santa bring you all that your heart can hope for.
Holiday to do-dees:
2. Pick up more coconut macaroon ingredients. Revel in the fact that I may have gotten the recipe oh-so-close to perfect.
3. Figure out why Princess Cat Zeeta-Blue is peeing on random things. Pray it is simply because she is sick of the organic biodegradable kitty litter I switched to and not some sort of kitten UTI.
4. Try to fix my durn vacuum so I am not coming back to a linty house.
5. Figure out a gift for Good Man that doesn't entail going to the mall, has meaning, is memorable, and won't freak him out.
6. Wash and detail my darling new vehicle: henceforth known as "Josephine (the Jetta)"
7. Bake and wrap said macaroons.
8. Write up "new year, new life" goals to post in my as-yet-to-be rearranged and organized study.
9. Take a breath.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Blech. Sunday was spent in a haze of pitiful tearing up on the couch while the sickly sicky took hold and Mr. Good Man held my head to his chest while the even beat of his heart kept me calm.
I never call in sick to work. N-e-v-e-r. One and a half times this week. Time to slug more 'cherry' syrup and head to bed. Goodness I like to whine.